Re: "Life 5.0" Operating System Update
You may have noticed for the past 18 days that available network resources have been diverted toward system-wide testing of speculative entertainment programs (Beach Runner, Cafe Visiter, Latino Market Shopper and Beach Runner 2.0: Dog Owner Edition) and vital educational programs (Subway Figure-Outer, Up-Hill Bike Route Avoider and Hospital Locater).
Noticeable slow-downs during prime use hours are blamed on critical upgrade program (Job Seeker: SF Bay Edition) running in the background of main operating system.
"JS:SFBE" utilizes approximately 50% of total energy reserves available to run "Life."
We at Mission Control apologize for this slowdown, and are happy to announce that as of eleven-fourteen this morning "JS:SFBE" has concluded work on phase one of its upgrade.
Activity Report:
Username: AUDREY
Jobs Secured: 1
Title: CENTER DIRECTOR
Location: SYLVAN LEARNING CENTER
Sub Directory: SAN BRUNO, CA
Start Date: 12.01.2008
Distance from Mission Control: 12.4 MILES
Approximate Salary: CLASSIFIED
Operational Parameters: FULL TIME
Benefits: FULL
Promotions awarded all around.
Celebration to follow this evening at Le P'tit Laurent.
All team members invited to attend.
CONGRADULATIONS on a successful upgrade! Here's to a new life and a soon to be new year with a new president! Life is sweet!
ReplyDelete"A Giant Step" for the Team! I hope you had a "Blast" off at L'Petit Laurent.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, Captain Audrey! Good job, Number One, Phil!
ReplyDeleteThat is so exciting! Congratulations!!!
ReplyDeleteHey... do you know where I can find a copy of Beach Runner 2.0: Dog Owner Edition??? That Up-Hill Bike-Route Avoider sounds pretty cool... too bad we don't have such a thing as "hills" here in fly-over country.